woman. chris caused me a lot of trouble. so why do i mishim so much? chris was a huge presence in our family, so he lived far away, had a lot of friends, had a very challenging job, he always came home. when he came home for the christmas or wedding or baby showers, he was really there. he wasn't texting. running, playing tennis, eating, drinking, telling stories and extracting our stories. his interest made us each feel very special. he believed in the value of every person's stories. once he visited me in seattle. i took him to visit an elderly friend in a nursing home. as we waited, chris started wandering, chatting up the other residents in their wheelchairs. soon he came back and said, anne, you have to meet this guy. he is a judge.